when books don't fit

i finally started reading purple hibiscus by chimamanda adichie last night, after three days of waffling over what to read. i HATE it when that happens. it does not happen very often (alhumdolillah!), but when i can't figure out what i want to read, when no books appeal to me, when nothing seems to fit, then i am very very upset. upset for two reasons i guess -first, because i have nothing to read, and second, because nothing is speaking to me, everything is making me feel blah!

this is like when i cannot figure out what to wear -again, i don't have this problem very frequently, as i am quite a decisive person. or, maybe decisive is not the word. i just know what i like, and i know when i feel like wearing it. i don't keep clothes that i don't like, and the stuff i have, i've had for a while! but when those days come along, when no rida speaks to me, when they all seem blah and ugh, then i am a miserable person.

clearly, not wanting to read any book or wear any of my ridas is a symptom of my mood. it is not that there aren't awesome books and clothes available.. this can apply to food as well, although not much.. but how interesting that this occurs.. i should pay more attention to whether such moods leak into other areas of my life..

#microblog mondays

great start to the year of the monkey

today is the first day of the lunar new year 2016, which is the year of the monkey. that's me! so, here's hoping for an awesome year, filled with love, health, prosperity and peace :)

i have three days off from work (working for a hk based ngo). that is awesome in itself, but what makes it truly awesome, is that these three days are only MINE -not being indian holidays, the twins have school, and hubby has work (can you imagine the enormous grin on my face?!). i have PLANS for these three days. some cleaning, baking, shopping and visiting. some time to breathe. ohhh :)

i'm off to start my holidays! 

circus!

my introduction to the circus as a child came with enid blyton's 'come to the circus' -fenella, aunt lou, bobo and pretty much all the characters were interesting/intriguing. the 'big top', the caravans, the animals and their trainers; it was a whole new world full of adventure and magic that i loved losing myself in.

then came the great moscow circus in hong kong, when i was slightly older (but i have no recollection of age to be honest). we went to see this awesome performance for several years, and i was in love. the trapeze artists were my absolute favorite (and still are). the gorgeous costumes, the glitter, the anticipation before each incredible act; i carry all these with me until today.

for some years after, i forgot about the circus. while at university, i read john irving's 'a son of the circus', which was much darker than my childhood circus fantasies. i recently read sara gruen's 'water for elephants', which was less dark, and a great read. next on my list of circus novels is erin morgenstern's 'the night circus', which is meant to be some kind of fantasy novel, and sounds intriguing.

last week, there was a local circus showing nearby, which we took the twins to. they enjoyed some of the acts (those with animals), but were far from thrilled with the idea of the circus. it was a let down for me as well, after my awesome memories of the great moscow circus, as well as the circus books that i so enjoyed. next time i plan my trip to hong kong, i must look in to the moscow circus -they now have a 'circus on ice' show as well!

the circus world is one that surely draws in all children.. and many adults. i can't wait to introduce the kids to blyton's 'come to the circus', and other novels, and read more circus novels myself :)

#microblog mondays
 

music, poetry, tv

i heard celine dion's 'my heart will go on' last night at the circus (no, it wasn't really fitting, but hey, 'this is mumbai my friend'!!) and i found myself automatically singing along. i cannot remember the last time i sung along to a song.. probably because i have totally stopped listening to english music here. hindi/bollywood songs just don't do anything for me, so i generally don't listen to any music anymore. which is quite sad. i enjoyed tracy chapman, dido, travis, beck, jason mraz.. i should make more of an effort to play this stuff here, even if it is not readily available on tv/radio.. i want my kids to be exposed to stuff other than bollywood 'item numbers'!

the lack of music in my life these days also reminds me that i have stopped reading poetry and watching tv shows (house, cis, the good wife, big bang theory).. there must be so many new shows out now, and i just don't have a clue! this will be harder to remedy than listening to music.. but i should try. the only reason i have given up on all this, is that they are not readily available here. i should just pick one show, and i am sure i can either find it on tv or online.. it all seems like such a headache, and i am happy to just read on my kindle.. but when i randomly hear some music, or listen to people talking about such and such show, i feel a pang for everything that i gave up..

#microblog mondays

one amazing thing

i just finished reading 'one amazing thing' by chitra divakaruni, and i really enjoyed it. i was doubly happy as after 'mistress of spices', which i totally LOVED, i hadn't read anything of hers that matched up. while 'one amazing thing' is not in the same league as 'mistress of spices', it was good. and it made me think about which stories matter to me, which stories are the pivots of my life, upon which other stories are built..

before reading the novel, i read several reviews that questioned the stories shared by a motley group of persons stuck in a visa office during an earthquake. the reviewers apparently did not find anything 'amazing' about the stories shared by the characters. what is amazing is surely subjective.. and probably largely dependent upon circumstances, your mood at the moment, how you feel about the persons around you and what you are willing to share with strangers.

also, our stories, along with us, will change. what i might have shared as a pivotal event while at university, may not be the same story i will share today. the stories i discuss with fellow moms will differ to those i discuss with childhood friends. the embarrassing event i could share with a complete stranger may not make it to any other ears.

anyone who ever made up stories fellow train/bus passengers, who wondered about the lives of those sitting besides them in cafes/libraries or those shopping alongside them at the supermarket, will enjoy this book :)

#microblog mondays
 

2015 in books

signing in to goodreads today, it showed me my year in books -i loved it! (the best part was probably seeing all the covers of the books i'd read, which i wasn't able to see on my kindle!!) they had stats like shortest/longest book, the most popular book on goodreads, the highest/lowest rated, and so forth. some of the books i had forgotten that i had read in 2015, and it was just a nice reminder.. each book brought back different feelings/thoughts..

goodreads is a great website to keep track of my books, and to come across new ones! yay :)

#microblog mondays
 

*happy* new year!

my parents flew in on dec 31, which was the best new year gift ever :) i hope to continue seeing family throughout the year, inshallah. the end of 2015 saw much discrimination and antagonism globally, and i can only pray that 2016 will be a better, more peaceful year.

i saw a post about happiness jars by elizabeth gilbert on facebook, and i loved the idea. i haven't found an ideal jar/container yet, so i have stored my slips of paper in a cute pouch for the moment. just writing out the little moments/incidents that i am thankful for makes me happier. i imagine that looking through this collection on a blah/sad day will be the equivalent of chicken soup for the soul, or looking through precious photo albums from the past :)

happiness begets happiness, so recording these moments can only bring on more such moments. and this ties in well with me wanting to practice more gratitude and optimism with the twins. so..  let the happiness begin!