27 February 2011

reclaiming my faith

my faith and religious practice have been something that i have been able to take for granted for most of my life. i grew up in an environment where both were a given. i share this given with both my siblings and the majority of my bohra friends.

as i have noted before, it is easier to have faith when the sun is shining and things are going my way. similarly, i find it easier to practice my faith when it is shared by others, when i am surrounded by fellow practitioners.

with a change in my environment, i find myself floundering a little. there are suddenly many excuses for my lapses in namaz and other deeds. yes, there are more obstacles now than before. yes, the road to good practice is no longer paved concrete. however, i am realizing that only i can reclaim my faith and practice. i will have to forge a new road for myself, and i will use the memory of the old one to help me. when my day of reckoning comes, i won't have to say that it was too hard, that my environment was not conducive. i will, inshallah, return to that road i grew up on, and will meet my fellow companions there (and perhaps take some new ones with me!).

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